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Wacky Patent Wednesdays: Thanksgiving Edition

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Method of cooking a frozen turkey: US 2005/0118315 A1

Method of cooking a frozen turkey: US 2005/0118315 A1

What better time to bring back Wacky Patent Wednesdays than the Wednesday before Thanksgiving? I just knew there had to be some crazy turkey-related patents out there — and Google Patent Search did not disappoint. So below, for your reading pleasure, please enjoy some excellent conversation starters for dinner in case things are a little . . . dry.

How many of you have been victim of someone who forgot to take the turkey out to defrost in time? It’s an all too common occurrence on Thanksgiving, which is why I’m surprised this method of cooking a frozen turkey, in which a turkey can be prepared from frozen to cooked all while in a bag, isn’t more popular.

Yes, a steamed turkey!

From the patent overview, this is “[a] preferred embodiment method of cooking a frozen bird includes cooking the frozen bird in a bag, which creates a steam environment to evenly and thoroughly cook the bird in a reasonable amount of time.”

Cooking Jacket - US4942809

Cooking Jacket - US4942809

If you’re not down with the steaming bag, you could always get your turkey fitted for a cooking jacket. From the overview,

A jacket for use in cooking large pieces of meat, turkeys, chickens, roasts and the like and is in the form of a mesh member having handle forming loops at each end to enable the turkey or other piece of meat to be retained in a jacket structure and easily lifted from the cooking pan, pot, vessel or the like. The jacket is constructed of a plastic material that is of one piece construction thereby eliminating seams which form areas of weakness with the mesh material enabling the cooking fluids to remain in the pan when the turkey, chicken or other large piece of meat is removed thereby saving all of the drippings for making gravy or other uses.

Cooking Rod - US 2008/0044536 A1

Cooking Rod - US 2008/0044536 A1

But let’s be honest: there’s nothing worse than an undercooked bird, which makes this cooking rod especially useful. From the overview,

A cooking rod has a piercing rod and an end, that together are configured to conduct heat into a central area of a piece of meat. The piercing rod may be formed from aluminum or other highly conductive material and has a sharpened end to enable it to pierce the meat during the insertion process. The end has a body that connects to the piercing rod and a fan connected to the body and configured to extend to capture heat from the environment to be conveyed into the interior of the piece of meat. The fan may optionally include grooves to increase the thermal exchange area, which grooves may also be arranged in a decorative pattern. Optionally, the fan may extend through a layer of foil covering the piece of meat to enable the fan to come into contact with the hot air in the oven to further accelerate cooking of the meat.

Yes, you could just buy a meat thermometer, but where’s the wacky in that?

How will your turkey be prepared this Thanksgiving? Any wackiness going on?

Happy Thanksgiving to all who are celebrating!

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November 23rd, 2011 at 6:17 am